One of the most pressing issues and common discussion points in couples counseling is trust, and there is no wonder why – it is after all exceptionally hard to live with someone we don’t trust.
What we often seem to forget however, as we go about our lives, is how there is one situation that is even harder – and that is not living in integrity and honesty with ourselves. Because it is when we lie to ourselves that the real darkness sets in. This is when everything starts falling apart. We become tired and loose our spark. Our energy flow is impacted, which in turn tampers our inner connection, and we loose our inspiration. We have now entered a vicious cycle of not believing in ourselves – which soon enough is experienced all around us. When we don’t trust ourselves, we can’t trust others.
Whilst I encourage always living in honesty with everyone around us, there are situations when I believe telling someone we care about a small innocent white lie to be acceptable under special circumstances. When my daughter was younger for example, I would not dream about telling her the entire truth about brutal accidents, and there were instances when I was not fully honest about what had happened.
This little sweet exception rule however, does not apply to ourselves. We cannot get away with not being true to our hearts. As much as we want to, we can’t simply talk our heart into ignoring a life situation, event or person that we feel uncomfortable with for some reason.
The repercussions of lying to ourselves can be felt on every level of our existence. Everything within us is interconnected. The energy flowing between our heart, soul and mind, immediately gets out of alignment when there is a dissonance somewhere. And there is no greater dissonance than one we have created ourselves.
What we can do however is to be honest with ourselves, and accept we feel uncomfortable feeling a certain way. It is much better to live in truth, and have our hearts, mind and soul aligned, knowing what’s going on. It is okay to feel sad sometimes. It is not okay to lie to ourselves though, and say we’re fine when we’re not. It is much better to live in acceptance and surrender to what is happening.
This is when we get our energy back in a healthy flow! And now we can get out and do things that make us happy, fill ourselves with joy, and blossom again!
With Love & Gratitude, Anna-Karin, xo
Anna-Karin Bjorklund is a writer and inspirational speaker, and the author of Dream Guidance: Interpret Your Dreams and Create the Life You Desire! She is also a Therapist in Newport Beach specializing in Dream Analysis, Anxiety, Public Speaking, Stress, and Couples therapy. She loves sharing her passion for dreams and soul growth with audiences near and far, and has made expert appearances on Fox & Friends, and the Steve Harvey TV Show on NBC, and been interviewed by Money Magazine, Daily Worth, Marie Claire UK and other media outlets.